TBB02 (Jun 28, 2001)
DISCLAIMER: THIS RECEIPT HAS BEEN UNLOCKED BY DIVISION TANGO (UPDATES 1-10).
Summary of Receipt
Espresso/Ned Langley leaves a message. He rambles on for a bit, before discussing the cooperation between certain members. Espresso, Black Coffee and Doppio are all apparently familiar with each other, and are linked to Lungo somehow. Either way, things aren't looking that good for the new CaD, really, and Lungo and Red Eye seem to be very suspicious.
Transcript
RECEIPT AS OF: 6/28/01
BARISTA ON DUTY: ESPRESSO
RECEIPT FILED AS: TBB-02
Well, this was a slim chance of happening, huh? I mean, it's got to be near-zero. One of those "over my dead body" types of things. But, let's be real, this body won't die any time soon. Built like a- well, no, I was going to say an American car, but that's not a great endorsement, is it? What's a thing that's built well these days? An Aztec temple, that's what my body is built like! Strong and st-hairy. HA! That's a good one, huh?
Cheese and crackers, I forgot what I was going to write about. I hope no one checks these. Do you usually check these? Aw, jeez, this is embarrassing. Let's see, statistically unlikely... oh right, right. The numbers, they're funnier than a Chaplin flick. The odds of this whole group getting together, well, it's almost impossible.
I know the Owner and obviously Doppio as well. So we'll say that's a 70% chance of us three working together, assuming the Owner asked us for help. We also know Lungo, but the Owner doesn't. Lungo does, however, know of the Owner. In any case, the four of us working together would be a 1% chance, I figure. Add in Red Eye and Galao, and we're looking at a 0.0005% chance of this group agreeing to work together. So clearly, there are some factors I haven't considered. Or could consider at this point.
Even with a standard adjustment for the unknown, it's still slim odds. Maybe 10%. Add in a common factor of the number after 7, and even then, it's maybe a 25% chance. Maybe. Well, gosh, maybe I do not see something here. I suppose it's worth considering Lungo as a "wildcard" of sorts. Normally I would think him to be a very unlikely individual to get along with. But perhaps the inverse is also equally true. They say he is a miracle worker, after all. So what could be 0.0005% might also be 99.9995% if Lungo wanted it to work out that way?
Just... keep your guard up around all these weirdos, J. Lungo and Red Eye specifically. Those two are operating on an entirely different level than the rest of us.