CD-TKT08 (Jan 31, 2022)
Puzzle
“Something to chew on: Ease your Somerton Burn-Out with…”
Knowledge | 2 Words
Clue
Hover over the clues if you require!
Clue 1: This can also be a Research puzzle, really. What do you 'chew on' to ease a specific sickness, as mentioned in Date With Death's ITN receipts?
Clue 2: Somerton? As in that man?
Clue 3: Something to chew on, indeed. Or half of them.
Answer and Explanation
Answer: Juicy Fruit
Explanation: Somerton is a reference to the Somerton Man, who was found dead on Somerton Park near Adelaide. "Something to chew on" refers to an item in his pocket: a half-empty packet of Juicy Fruit chewing gum. Additionally, Juicy Fruit is said to counteract dimensional displacement sickness.
Summary of Receipt
Dover, or Mr. Bartlett, leaves a receipt. He’s been filled in by Shaka regarding their Eden issue, and finds it a really stupid idea since you can’t close the doors to Eden once they’re open. And they’ve been closed for fifteen Spheres. Of course, you could probably also use the Pocketwatch or the Staff of Solomon to manipulate time and force it open, but Bartlett, empowered by 71, could also probably just rip Eden open. Still, it’s kinda useless, and Bartlett suggests just chucking Augustine into the Black Tide, because it’s not like immortal Elders are going to benefit from further immortality. Or, if that doesn’t work, maybe think for a bit before upsetting the cosmic balance that badly.
Transcript
[BRANCH] UNSPECIFIED
[SERVER] NONCAD05
[DATE] 1/31/22
[INDEX ID] TKT08
[SECURITY] AND & ARCHIVES
Nightmare, nightmare, nightmare! How does anyone LIVE in that horrible cycle?? I was called names, kicked, gnawed on, used for target practice, and framed for MULTIPLE crimes I did not commit. (I did commit a few crimes while there, though. When in Rome!) Also, WALL CLOWNS. Ed did NOT tell me there would be WALL CLOWNS. Thinking back on it, I kind of wish I knew about them because it would have been way funnier if I swapped the Fungi Clowns for Wall Clowns. Oh well, live and learn and laugh and love. Ugh. Wall Clowns. Horrid creatures. Horrid place. Horrid cycle. Ed's fun, though. I mean, was it an awful experience? Yes. Hands down. But it was awful in a summer camp kind of way. I would go again to make some friendship bracelets.
Anyway, crap, I didn't introduce myself properly. It's me. Dover. You should already know me because I'm your favorite Demon! Well, actually, that's not true. Based on a general popularity ranking, Mr. Loveland edges me out by quite a bit. Hard to compete with him. So, I guess I could settle for your favorite Hauntaurskaldian Demon. It's a much easier category to compete in because, well, let's face it, the motley crew of murders isn't a cheerful bunch. I? I am a cheerful bunch. And, while you did try to shove me into a pocket dimension, I get it. I was causing quite the problems for you guys. Here's the good news, though, I don't have to cause problems. I can be nice. I can be friendly. Or, no, wait, that's cafe-speak for not-friendly, right? So I can be… uh… useful? For the right price, of course.
Anyway, good ol' Non-CaD 03 filled me in with your little problem. Or, uh, big. Big problem. Miss. Augustine? Woof. Funny. But woof. So, yeah, I don't know what I can do exactly. I mean, I read the reports. No. 5 wants No. 71 to power me up so I can rip open Eden for you to shove Miss. Augustine back in there. Seems… like a lousy plan. Mainly because, and I think this is very obvious by now, open doors can't be closed. Sure, you get Miss. Augustine back in Eden but then… Eden's open. Eden hasn't been "open" for not years, not eons, SPHERES. 15 of 'em. For those keeping track, well, gee, we're on the 16th, so, you know, more often than not, Eden has been off-limits.
Then again… It also hasn't been off-limits entirely. It's not an impossible task by any means. People do come and go to Eden from time to time, but that's just it isn't it? Time. You need chronological distortion, not dimensional. Pocketwatch, Solomon's Scepter, uh, I don't know, maybe Nine could do it. Sure I can probably rip Eden open, but… like… why? Seems like a hacksaw instead of a scalpel. Can't you just throw Miss. Augustine into the Black Tide and call it a day? What will a bunch of Elders do with it? Become more Elderly?
Here's the thing. I'm not saying "no." I'm just saying it seems like we haven't thought this through. I'll stick around and help but let's maybe brainstorm some other plans before throwing off the cosmic balance of things, and that's coming from ME. That's my whole gimmick. Sure, time will keep ticking, but once Eden's open, it's only going to tick down.